Lexicon
The looksmaxxing dictionary. Study up.
-maxxing
A suffix you bolt onto any activity to imply total optimization: sleepmaxxing, gymmaxxing, snackmaxxing, doing-absolutely-nothing-maxxing. The Chud is a -maxxing pluralist.
6-7
A number combination of no fixed meaning that conquered the internet through sheer repetition. The Chud deploys it in place of greetings, prayers, and most emotional needs.
Ascend
To level up into a higher tier of attractiveness. Chuds do not ascend. Chuds descend, which is faster and requires no cardio.
Aura
Your ambient presence, measured in points the universe does not actually award. Chads farm aura. Chuds farm anti-aura, and hold a frankly historic reserve.
Aura farming
Accruing vibe through studied unbotheredness. The Chud aura-farms by walking into a glass door and continuing as though nothing occurred.
Chadlite
Highly attractive, above average, but missing the one feature that would make him a full Chad. Still mogs you. Sorry.
Chud
The apex specimen of these rankings. Where the Chad ascends, the Chud descends — further, faster, and with snacks. Roughly 1% of the population by genetics; 99% by 2 AM.
Chudmaxxing
The inverse art: maximizing one's chud. Achieved through ambitious hoodies, structural slouching, and a religious refusal to stand near good lighting.
Cope
A comforting rationalization that sidesteps reality ("it's just cope"). The Chud has elevated coping to a competitive sport and is currently undefeated.
Cortisol spike
The belief that stress is physically deranging your face in real time. The Chud's cortisol spikes for exactly two reasons: the words "we need to talk," and the self-checkout announcing "unexpected item in bagging area."
Frauding
Using angles, lighting, and filters to look far better in photos than in person. The Chud reverse-frauds: somehow looks worse in every photo than in real life, a power science cannot explain.
Glow up
A dramatic improvement in looks. Its sacred opposite, the glow down, is the Chud's natural trajectory and is to be celebrated.
Goblin mode
Fully embracing the unkempt, the slovenly, the gloriously feral. For the Chud this is not a phase; it is the foundation.
Hunter eyes
Deep-set, intense, predatory eyes. The Chud has gatherer eyes: warm, slightly damp, perpetually scanning for the buffet.
Jestermaxxing
Compensating for a lack of bone structure with overwhelming comedic charisma. The Chud's primary stat — can't mew, but can make the whole room laugh and then trip over a chair to seal it.
Looksmaxxing
The heroic discipline of maximizing one's appearance through skincare, surgery, and quiet despair. The Chud has read the entire manual and chosen violence (specifically, ordering wings).
Mewing
Pressing your tongue to the roof of your mouth to summon a jawline. (It does not, in fact, restructure an adult skull.) The Chud mews exclusively while forgetting why.
Mog / to mog
To dominate someone purely by standing near them. In Chud Rankings the current flows the other way: the goal is to get mogged by the largest possible object, including furniture, livestock, and weather.
Mogged
The honored state of being visibly outclassed. A true Chud has been mogged by a folding chair and thanked it.
Sigma
The lone-wolf male who needs no one. The Chud is sigma-adjacent, largely because no one texted back.